Post by Theodore Waldo Bernard on Nov 5, 2009 9:04:18 GMT 9.5
Biographical Information
Name: Theodore Waldo Bernard
Gender: Boy parts
Place of Birth: Albuquerque, New Mexico
Date of Birth (Age): January 1, 1969
Height: 5’11”
Blood Type: A+
Hair: Blond – cut short to the head.
Eyes: A dazzling blue
ID Marks: His body is as clean as a baby’s rear. In the past he has awoken with a few “I LOVE ----“ tattoos, but thanks to modern and some mildly alien technology – they no longer exist. Naturally he does not have any freckles, and has only had fake piercings for Halloween.
Academic Information
Occupation: Xenobiologist – ie dude that likes to play with alien parts.
Service: Civilian
Position: Professor of Awesome.
Personal History
Early life: In the beginning, Theo was being taught right out of the womb, by his single mother – Loretta. She was (as she called herself) a “fallen genius”, that many had assumed gone mad from an encounter in Roswell before Theo’s birth. She claimed that he was the product of alien probing. Everyone just smiled and nodded – not wanting to egg-on the obviously insane woman. Even with what others called ‘insanity’ – her mind continued to be sharp. As soon as the embryonic fluid was wiped of Theo’s face, he found himself being brainwashed to be a future genius.
Theo never resisted the hard-core-studying that took place as soon as the first cry emerged from his tiny throat (for he was a bit premature – therefore tiny). It just seemed like part of life for the infant. Apparently his mom’s ‘genius’ rubbed off on him, for the boy took to it all too quickly. He was speaking before he could walk. He was tying shoes before he wore shoes with laces. He was reading before his age group could hold books.
He spent exactly one day in Pre-school, before he was moved to Kindergarten. By the second week, he was in first grade. He actually managed to spend the entire year in that grade. Good for him. The school hated him. With passion. It seemed like it couldn’t hold him in a grade for more then a few months.
Life at home continued to be weird, as Theo slowly aged. Loretta continued to take random trips to Roswell. Sometimes it would be for an hour or so. Sometimes a few hours. Sometimes a few days. Once she was gone for an entire week. Good thing Theo didn’t feel the need to call child services – but instead managed to find a friend to live with, claiming his mother was on vacation.
His smarts gave Theo an ego the size of Russia. He thought he was gorgeous, smart, and amazing. And so did a lot of people. And he knew it. By the time he had made his way through elementary school – he was several years ahead of the rest. Even further after Middle School. And especially after high school.
At age fourteen, he was accepted into Cornell University – and scuttled off away from home – mildly glad to be away from his mother. Unlike the rest of his life, however, he took his time to get through the four years of basic studies to acquire his BS (an acronym he still finds funny) in Biology with a concentration in Anatomy. This landed him at age eighteen – going for his Masters degree. Through these years, he met a man by the name of Raph Meyers – who quickly became a good friend of his. Though the man was several years older then he [like everyone else] – he didn’t mind. They got along. So why would it matter?
Eight years of college was pretty insane. Several times he ended up waking up in places he had never seen before, draped under people he had never met, holding a drink he had never heard of. Best years of his life. He was never one to bring up his young age, making others accept him more then in previous years of his schooling. By the time he was going for his Ph.D, he was actually the average college age. He was actually normal. Yay.
After he held a Ph.D in his field, he took a break from everything, and found himself in all ends of the Earth, discovering what was legal and illegal in every corner of the spherical planet. By the time that year which he still can’t quite remember came to a close, he received a letter from an organization in Nevada. Before long, he ended up in Area 51.
Hahaha…really?
Really.
Pretty soon, he ended up being an alien coroner in many senses – poking and prodding at alien bodies once they had died in this odd prison-like-place for intergalactic species. After several years of playing with the guts of little-green-men, Theo was transferred to Colorado…only to run into a familiar face.
RAPH!
And his beautiful wife McKenzie. It wasn’t long before the shiny pair had a pup of their own – a little pink thing called Persephone. It wasn’t uncommon for ‘Uncle Theo’ as he was later named – to make random appearances in the household. That was…until the accident. McKenzie was off-world when it happened – landing her on a slowly growing list of ‘humans that were killed off-world.’
Raph and Seph moved back to Raph’s hometown, leaving Theo at the SGC alone. Jerks.
He continued to do his work – occasionally finding himself offworld. At one point however, he found himself in Maine – attempting to convince Raph to come back to the SGC. Enough of his brooding.
Sadly, that resulted in the only real fight the duo have ever had. And that doesn’t mean a verbal one. Considering Raph is quite a bit bigger then Theo – he kicked the guys ass, leaving the younger one with a black eye, broken nose, and a tongue he nearly bit through. Not their high point.
However, over recent times, the Stargate Academy started to tempt Theo. Something different. Eventually he sent in his application to be a professor and got in. So did Raph. And so did little Persephone – who’ll be joining them as a student.
Fun times ahead, indeed.
Education:
•Pre School
•Elementary School
•Junior High
•High School
•Cornell University
Military Record: HAHAHAHAHA. None.
Family: Loretta Bernard – 60 - Mommy
Personality: Eccentric. Over the top. Too far. Too much. Explicit. Inappropriate for children under 18. All these phrases have described Theo. None aren’t accurate, either. Thanks to brainwashing from a small child, he carries an impressive head upon his shoulders, which he now uses to chop up aliens. Yes, chop them up. And play with them. Also thanks to a somewhat high libido, he uses that impressive mind to get him laid on a regular basis. Yes, I just went there.
Though complex, his mind is somewhat whimsical and childlike – which he blames on the fact that his psychotic [possibly brainwashed by aliens] mother, back in New Mexico. She taught him right out of the womb, giving him no real chance to be a kid. So he’s one now. MUAHAHA. Every chance he gets, he has fun. Or what he defines as fun. Some people may call it ‘being bad’ or ‘hey that’s illegal’ or ‘that shouldn’t go there’ – but he calls it fun.
Though it seems as though all Theo wants is fun, he’s much deeper then that. Overall he enjoys friendship…though really only considers a few select people close. Thanks to his ‘super outgoing’ and ‘mildly insane’ manner, few people are able or want to handle him. The few true friends he has he’d honestly do anything for. One time that ended with him with a broken nose and black eye.
Sad face.
Alas, Theo is a bit self-centered as well. Sometimes he just wants what’s best for him and his amazingly large ego. He occasionally defends this with the notion, ‘If I didn’t look out for me, I’d end up like you little people.’ Such kind words. He’s not afraid of annoying or alienating strangers, which occasionally gets him into loads of trouble…which he doesn’t care about – unless the word ‘prison’ is involved. He doesn’t like prison. Been in it a few times. But he hates it. HATES it.
Despite being partially insane, he’s good at what he does – Xenobiology. He’s very dedicated to his career, contrary to popular belief. Theo loves what he does, and is very content with the idea of being an epic Professor. It’ll be a nice change from what he’s been doing for over ten years. Shh. He doesn’t look his age, and plans to keep it that way.
Avatar Character: Neil Patrick Harris ☺
Name/Country: Hayles/USA
Do you agree with the rules of Stargate Academy? NEVER >.>
Are you a member of any of our affiliates? Mhm.
Roleplay Example:
0715
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Starbuck Coffee
Name: Theodore Waldo Bernard
Gender: Boy parts
Place of Birth: Albuquerque, New Mexico
Date of Birth (Age): January 1, 1969
Height: 5’11”
Blood Type: A+
Hair: Blond – cut short to the head.
Eyes: A dazzling blue
ID Marks: His body is as clean as a baby’s rear. In the past he has awoken with a few “I LOVE ----“ tattoos, but thanks to modern and some mildly alien technology – they no longer exist. Naturally he does not have any freckles, and has only had fake piercings for Halloween.
Academic Information
Occupation: Xenobiologist – ie dude that likes to play with alien parts.
Service: Civilian
Position: Professor of Awesome.
Personal History
Early life: In the beginning, Theo was being taught right out of the womb, by his single mother – Loretta. She was (as she called herself) a “fallen genius”, that many had assumed gone mad from an encounter in Roswell before Theo’s birth. She claimed that he was the product of alien probing. Everyone just smiled and nodded – not wanting to egg-on the obviously insane woman. Even with what others called ‘insanity’ – her mind continued to be sharp. As soon as the embryonic fluid was wiped of Theo’s face, he found himself being brainwashed to be a future genius.
Theo never resisted the hard-core-studying that took place as soon as the first cry emerged from his tiny throat (for he was a bit premature – therefore tiny). It just seemed like part of life for the infant. Apparently his mom’s ‘genius’ rubbed off on him, for the boy took to it all too quickly. He was speaking before he could walk. He was tying shoes before he wore shoes with laces. He was reading before his age group could hold books.
He spent exactly one day in Pre-school, before he was moved to Kindergarten. By the second week, he was in first grade. He actually managed to spend the entire year in that grade. Good for him. The school hated him. With passion. It seemed like it couldn’t hold him in a grade for more then a few months.
Life at home continued to be weird, as Theo slowly aged. Loretta continued to take random trips to Roswell. Sometimes it would be for an hour or so. Sometimes a few hours. Sometimes a few days. Once she was gone for an entire week. Good thing Theo didn’t feel the need to call child services – but instead managed to find a friend to live with, claiming his mother was on vacation.
His smarts gave Theo an ego the size of Russia. He thought he was gorgeous, smart, and amazing. And so did a lot of people. And he knew it. By the time he had made his way through elementary school – he was several years ahead of the rest. Even further after Middle School. And especially after high school.
At age fourteen, he was accepted into Cornell University – and scuttled off away from home – mildly glad to be away from his mother. Unlike the rest of his life, however, he took his time to get through the four years of basic studies to acquire his BS (an acronym he still finds funny) in Biology with a concentration in Anatomy. This landed him at age eighteen – going for his Masters degree. Through these years, he met a man by the name of Raph Meyers – who quickly became a good friend of his. Though the man was several years older then he [like everyone else] – he didn’t mind. They got along. So why would it matter?
Eight years of college was pretty insane. Several times he ended up waking up in places he had never seen before, draped under people he had never met, holding a drink he had never heard of. Best years of his life. He was never one to bring up his young age, making others accept him more then in previous years of his schooling. By the time he was going for his Ph.D, he was actually the average college age. He was actually normal. Yay.
After he held a Ph.D in his field, he took a break from everything, and found himself in all ends of the Earth, discovering what was legal and illegal in every corner of the spherical planet. By the time that year which he still can’t quite remember came to a close, he received a letter from an organization in Nevada. Before long, he ended up in Area 51.
Hahaha…really?
Really.
Pretty soon, he ended up being an alien coroner in many senses – poking and prodding at alien bodies once they had died in this odd prison-like-place for intergalactic species. After several years of playing with the guts of little-green-men, Theo was transferred to Colorado…only to run into a familiar face.
RAPH!
And his beautiful wife McKenzie. It wasn’t long before the shiny pair had a pup of their own – a little pink thing called Persephone. It wasn’t uncommon for ‘Uncle Theo’ as he was later named – to make random appearances in the household. That was…until the accident. McKenzie was off-world when it happened – landing her on a slowly growing list of ‘humans that were killed off-world.’
Raph and Seph moved back to Raph’s hometown, leaving Theo at the SGC alone. Jerks.
He continued to do his work – occasionally finding himself offworld. At one point however, he found himself in Maine – attempting to convince Raph to come back to the SGC. Enough of his brooding.
Sadly, that resulted in the only real fight the duo have ever had. And that doesn’t mean a verbal one. Considering Raph is quite a bit bigger then Theo – he kicked the guys ass, leaving the younger one with a black eye, broken nose, and a tongue he nearly bit through. Not their high point.
However, over recent times, the Stargate Academy started to tempt Theo. Something different. Eventually he sent in his application to be a professor and got in. So did Raph. And so did little Persephone – who’ll be joining them as a student.
Fun times ahead, indeed.
Education:
•
•Elementary School
•Junior High
•High School
•Cornell University
Military Record: HAHAHAHAHA. None.
Family: Loretta Bernard – 60 - Mommy
Personality: Eccentric. Over the top. Too far. Too much. Explicit. Inappropriate for children under 18. All these phrases have described Theo. None aren’t accurate, either. Thanks to brainwashing from a small child, he carries an impressive head upon his shoulders, which he now uses to chop up aliens. Yes, chop them up. And play with them. Also thanks to a somewhat high libido, he uses that impressive mind to get him laid on a regular basis. Yes, I just went there.
Though complex, his mind is somewhat whimsical and childlike – which he blames on the fact that his psychotic [possibly brainwashed by aliens] mother, back in New Mexico. She taught him right out of the womb, giving him no real chance to be a kid. So he’s one now. MUAHAHA. Every chance he gets, he has fun. Or what he defines as fun. Some people may call it ‘being bad’ or ‘hey that’s illegal’ or ‘that shouldn’t go there’ – but he calls it fun.
Though it seems as though all Theo wants is fun, he’s much deeper then that. Overall he enjoys friendship…though really only considers a few select people close. Thanks to his ‘super outgoing’ and ‘mildly insane’ manner, few people are able or want to handle him. The few true friends he has he’d honestly do anything for. One time that ended with him with a broken nose and black eye.
Sad face.
Alas, Theo is a bit self-centered as well. Sometimes he just wants what’s best for him and his amazingly large ego. He occasionally defends this with the notion, ‘If I didn’t look out for me, I’d end up like you little people.’ Such kind words. He’s not afraid of annoying or alienating strangers, which occasionally gets him into loads of trouble…which he doesn’t care about – unless the word ‘prison’ is involved. He doesn’t like prison. Been in it a few times. But he hates it. HATES it.
Despite being partially insane, he’s good at what he does – Xenobiology. He’s very dedicated to his career, contrary to popular belief. Theo loves what he does, and is very content with the idea of being an epic Professor. It’ll be a nice change from what he’s been doing for over ten years. Shh. He doesn’t look his age, and plans to keep it that way.
Avatar Character: Neil Patrick Harris ☺
Name/Country: Hayles/USA
Do you agree with the rules of Stargate Academy? NEVER >.>
Are you a member of any of our affiliates? Mhm.
Roleplay Example:
0715
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Starbuck Coffee
Theo’s life had been…as it always had. Playing with dead alien parts, and often making obscene and mildly sexual gestures to whoever happens to walk by. That was life. Now it was taking another turn. He was going to be Professor Doctor Bernard. Frightening. For them. Those poor, poor children. He’d probably scare half of them away with the bone saw. Maybe. Or maybe the small adults would come back for more – actually forcing him to teach.
Damn.
Or yay?
He wasn’t sure yet.
Another change in his life was sitting at a table a few feet away, as Theo placed his order. No, it was not some sultry model from Brazil, nor ‘the one that got away’ – but rather someone who had broken his nose at their last meeting. And given him a black eye. Normally, with a description like that – the person would be an enemy. Considering that the two had survived getting a Ph.D together, though – plus several years in the SGC…well, that almost made the broken nose okay. Well – not okay. His beautiful snout was forever slightly tilted. It simply made the wound easier to heal. Sort of. Well he was back – that was the main good thing. They were both going to teach now – at the Stargate Academy.
Not only were the dynamic duo back together yet again, but they were both going to teach Raph’s spawn, Seph. He had known her since she was a bump in her mother’s tummy. He even had managed to get the title of ‘uncle’ by the kid. Epic on several levels.
Taking a deep breath, Theo smiled at the barista, before making eye contact and rattling off his order, ”Umm…. Yeah… I’d like to have a Venti, sugar-free, non-fat, vanilla soy, double shot, decaf, no foam, extra hot, Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha with light whip and extra syrup… Please.”
A look of hatred filled her features, before she barked the order word-for-word over her shoulder.
The girl was pro.
Theo didn’t exactly love whatever the hell he just ordered…nor did he have any idea what it tasted like. It was just oddly complicated and made him feel important. That’s all that mattered, really.
Soon enough, he was sitting across from his old college buddy, drinking some sort of odd mix of everything, as Raph waited for his kid to go through testing to see if she was SGA material.
They both knew she was.
“Long time no see,” Theo stated, taking an oddly long sip of his horrible mix.
He nearly gagged.
But held it in.
He still had his pride, dammit.
